Describe and reflection

1. The earliest memory I can remember of talking with my parents about the expectations of my gender

    When I was two years old my parents became divorced.  My younger brother and I moved with my mother to Wisconsin where she was from and my father moved to Hawaii.  My mom raised the two of us with a lot of help from my grandmother. We didn't get to know our dad until we were older and almost out of high school.  This definitely had an impact on me and my brother growing up.  Don't get me wrong my brother and I have turned out great. My mom and grandma did everything they could and more to make sure we had everything we needed growing up.  The earliest interaction I can remember havening with my mom about the expectations of my gender was when I was real young, probably around five years old.  I remember my friend pulled a band aid of my leg and I started crying.  My friend started making fun of me for crying, I remember running inside and hiding in my room.  When my mom came in and asked me what was wrong I was embarrassed and didn't want to tell her about it.  I told my mom I didn't want to see her because I was crying and boys weren't supposed to cry.  That is when my awesome mom calmly explained to me that it is ok for boys and men to cry.  I remember her explaining to me if people don't cry, then all their feeling will build up inside and they will become toxic and sick.  I can also remember her explaining to me situations that the older men I knew who were my friends parents around the neighborhood would cry, if certain things happened to them.  My mom was very good at explaining how it was ok for us as boys to share are emotions if we were happy, sad, or mad.  It didn't matter if we were a boy or a girl, it was ok for people to see you be sad and cry.

2. The most recent communication I had with someone who communicated expectations of my gender

    This is somthing that happened to me the other day.  One of my friends girlfriends invited my girlfriend and I over for brunch this Sunday.  My girlfriend, not thinking that it was super bowl Sunday accepted.  I am a Packers fan, they happen to be playing in the super bowl this Sunday, and I am planning on being at my friend from Wisconsins house at his super bowl party.  When my girlfriend told me about the Sunday brunch plans, I knew I had to call and tell my friends girlfriend and tell her I couldnt make.  When I called to tell her why I couldn't come she responded by saying "Oh I forgot your a man, you have to watch the super bowl".  My comment back to her was "I don't have to watch the super bowl, I am choosing to, and that I know plenty of men that will not be watching the super bowl".  I felt like she was saying that an expectation of the male gender is that males like football and have to watch the super bowl.  This is simply not true, I no plenty of men who have no interest in football.  My girlfriends dad being one of them.